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Coping, therapiers, tips... : Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame? (Page 4)

Topic created on 24th Oct. 2017 | Page: 4 of 4 | Answers: 39 | Views: 15,577
Anonym

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

31st Mar. 2018, at 11:22 am CEST#31
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I am not addicted to gambling, but unfortunately I have my own experiences with other addictions.
I had an eating disorder for many years and I dare say that you never fully recover from it. Food is an addictive substance that you have to learn to deal with, every day. You can't "just stop doing it." For me, it was a very rocky road and a cold war I fought against myself.
At the time, when I was very deep in the eating disorder, there was simply no way to visually deny the situation. Nevertheless, I did it - out of shame.
I was and always have been the type of woman of the "I can take care of myself, I am strong" and it was also insanely important to me to keep up this appearance even in my darkest hours.
Looking back, I feel sorry for that girl from back then. When I think of my past "self," I wish I could tell her that everything was going to be okay.
Shame was pervasive back then. I don't have a patent on how to deal with it. I simply hated myself extremely for many years.

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RiverSong
Legend

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

31st Mar. 2018, at 06:48 pm CEST#32
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SuitedTrips wrote on 03/31/2018 at 11:22 am: I am not addicted to gambling, but unfortunately have my share of experiences with other addictions.
I was eating disordered for many years and I dare say you never fully recover from it. Food is an addictive substance that you have to learn to deal with, every day. You can't "just stop doing it." For me, it was a very rocky road and a cold war I fought against myself.
At the time, when I was very deep in the eating disorder, there was simply no way to visually deny the situation. Nevertheless, I did it - out of shame.
I was and always have been the type of woman of the "I can take care of myself, I am strong" and it was also insanely important to me to keep up this appearance even in my darkest hours.
Looking back, I feel sorry for that girl from back then. When I think of my past "self," I wish I could tell her that everything was going to be okay.
Shame was pervasive back then. I don't have a patent on how to deal with it. I simply hated myself extremely for many years.

i'm sure you don't want to be reminded of it. Were you ever in a clinic where you had to sit in a room for about 20 minutes after eating? you weren't allowed to talk or laugh, otherwise there was an extension.

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Anonym

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

4th Apr. 2018, at 12:36 pm CEST#33
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Iseedeadpeople wrote on 03/31/2018 at 18:48
you definitely don't want to be reminded, were you also once in a clinic where you had to sit in a room for about 20 min after eating? not allowed to talk not allowed to laugh otherwise there was extension.

No, I was never in therapy or in a clinic. I tried to get out of it on my own. It worked, but probably took an unnecessarily long time. It was false pride on my part and the unwillingness to get help.

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RiverSong
Legend

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

5th Apr. 2018, at 11:46 am CEST#34
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SuitedTrips wrote on 04/04/2018 at 12:36 PM
No, I never went to therapy or a clinic. I tried it out there on my own. Worked, but probably took an unnecessarily long time. Was false pride on my part at the time and unwillingness to get help.

could have been the better way for you, even if it sometimes takes a bit longer. i know some people who were in a dilemma after the clinic

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Tolga
Rookie

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

25th Nov. 2018, at 09:25 am CET#35
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i hide it from everyone... I am southern and my family is religious I can not tell anyone only a few close friends who also pulled themselves know it we also often playm together but my uncles my family brothers and sisters no one knows and they should not I think but my father and mother have already heard a lot and can think of it but with us something like this is a taboo subject

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G****e

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

25th Nov. 2018, at 10:50 am CET#36
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Eventually it will come out. I was also extremely addicted for a long time. Money was there and paid every day until stop then at some point became very scarce with the dough. Then I told my family, were clearly disappointed, but have supported me. I am especially grateful to my wife that she stayed with me. Therapy made, one tells the therapist like what where etc.. Is good to talk about it but ultimately you have to get out of it yourself. Bank changed, wife card and online banking given and so it runs quite well. Today I pay now and then still 10-25 EUR with Paysafecard but only to daddeln a bit. The point is you have to talk to someone even if it is hard. That brings the most. The family supports you in any case. Whether southerners or not, it is unpleasant for everyone

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Ichbins2018
Top Member

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

25th Nov. 2018, at 10:56 am CET#37
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Hey Tolga,

gambling addiction has been a recognized disease for a long time and since when do you have to be ashamed of a disease?
If you want, you can still be ashamed - not because you are sick, but because you do not
but because you do not let yourself be helped.

Maybe you should think about it instead of indulging in your addiction

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Anonym

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

19th Dec. 2018, at 08:10 pm CET#38
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Greetings to you,

yes, so I'm glad that this topic of Gambling addiction is being expanded here more and more and is receiving more attention.

i would like to write plain text: It was for me and is still today a really very embarrassing situation. I had to disclose myself to my boss and my house bank. this was extremely
embarrassing and I was also allowed to listen to quite a few awesome remarks.

Well, I survived it but even worse is that the matter has leaked into my department. Now this is for the colleagues a found food to blaspheme.

Well, M...... ... have again no coal, haha I fly to Dubai and from there we make cruise All incl. and new car also bought. here look what I have in the wallet etc..

It hurts a lot and is embarrassing. against it I can now do nothing more and also admit this mistake.

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Anonym

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

19th Dec. 2018, at 08:12 pm CET#39
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Howard wrote on 12/19/2018 at 8:10 pm: Greetings to you,

yes so glad this topic of Gambling addiction is expanding here and getting more attention.

i would like to write plain text : it was for me and is still today a really very embarrassing situation. I had to reveal myself to my boss and my house bank. this was extremely
embarrassing and I was allowed to listen to quite a few awesome remarks about it.

Well, I survived it but even worse is that the matter has leaked into my department. Now this is for the colleagues a found food to blaspheme.

Well, M...... ... have again no coal, haha I fly to Dubai and from there we make cruise All incl. and new car also bought. here look what I have in the wallet etc..

It hurts already very much and is embarrassing. against it I can do now nix more and admit also this mistake

You should not be embarrassed. I would tell your colleagues the right thing to do. Whoever needs to make an addict look stupid has enough problems of his own.

In my company, these colleagues would immediately be cited to the personnel department.

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Pagani
Rookie

Shame for gambling addiction: How do you deal with this shame?

20th Dec. 2018, at 08:59 am CET#40
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At that time I had to disclose everything at the Jobcenter (I had a bone job but it was still not enough). Of course, the payments were noticed at that time and I was taken aside. One wanted to help me, etc. I was so ashamed and broke out in tears... Then I went to the addiction counseling and let them tell me that I should get inpatient treatment and that it would be important to confide in someone and to give this person my credit cards and so on. I am still annoyed that I did this. This person made me rather down for it and still in addition the topic always comes in the argument again on the table. All big crap. "Let's see what your environment says about you being addicted to gambling" or "Just look at your pathetic life. Squatting in front of the computer every evening", whereas since this year I can always think to myself "Well, that's why I also have a new car, and you? I have never told anyone that I was so lucky at the beginning of the year. For me it makes no difference whether I win or lose. That's my business

I often think about whether I am really addicted to gambling or whether I use it as an excuse for simply being undisciplined. I can rest so nicely on the notion and the disease

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