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Gambling addiction in general: Lend money to gambling addicts?

Topic created on 10th Apr. 2018 | Page: 1 of 2 | Answers: 14 | Views: 6,118
Marie3010

Lend money to gambling addicts?

10th Apr. 2018, at 04:19 pm CEST#1
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Hi there,

maybe I find good advice here, I have been a silent reader and now I thought I'll write something myself

The following problem: I have lent someone money to play...we are not talking about 10 or 100 euros, but it is in the 4-digit range. Trustworthy person (actually), but so far instead of repayment there were only flimsy excuses and probably the money was gambled away again. Offers to go to therapy (so together) remained unfortunately unimpressed. I don't know what to do, because since it was amicable, I don't have the means to take legal action. I also feel sorry for the person. However, it is a lot of money and I do not want to endanger our friendship. Everything stupid! If this continues, my friend lands there still on the street...

was probably also my mistake, but what would you do? Does anyone have experience with this and advice? On the one hand to get vll a part of the money back (hey, gambling debts are also debts of honor, right?), on the other hand to help even if the Gambling addiction is not admitted and is blocked?

Thank you in advance!

Marie



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J****r

Lend money to gambling addicts?

10th Apr. 2018, at 05:02 pm CEST#2
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Hello Marie
You write that you lent him money to play with. Therefore you knew that it would be gambled away. If the person with the money had won, would you also have made the suggestion with the therapy?
But of course he should pay it back. Offer him very low rates and insist that they are kept. If you put him under pressure (therapy) you may never see your money again and endanger your friendship even more.
Sure you want to help him but you "only" lent him money. What he does with it is basically his business and does not give you the right to interfere in his life. Provided of course you get it back.
LG

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gagapapamama
Expert

Lend money to gambling addicts?

10th Apr. 2018, at 05:05 pm CEST#3
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Hello and welcome to the forum, what you describe is also happened to me, have somewhere here in the forum also described once, I had my best friend also borrowed money in the 4 digit range and what has become of it, here the short description, friendship lost and money lost. The money has not itched me but the friendship I have lost that goes to me today after. So it will also happen to you always excuses etc.. But you can only learn from experience.

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P****1

Lend money to gambling addicts?

10th Apr. 2018, at 05:06 pm CEST#4
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JoKer wrote on 04/10/2018 at 17:02: Hi Marie
You write you lent him money to play with. From there you knew it would be gambled away. If the person with the money would have won, would you have also made the suggestion with therapy?
But of course he should pay it back. Offer him very low rates and insist that they are kept. If you put him under pressure (therapy) you may never see your money again and endanger your friendship even more.
Sure you want to help him but you "only" lent him money. What he does with it is basically his business and does not give you the right to interfere in his life. Provided of course you get it back.
LG

You summed it up well. I agree with your opinion.

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Anonym

Lend money to gambling addicts?

10th Apr. 2018, at 05:38 pm CEST#5
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I have borrowed many years ago once a work colleague 700, - marks, yes is long ago, which was gone the next day. I had everything confirmed in writing and went with it to the lawyer, they have also found in Berlin. He had a lot of other creditors. I have about the lawyer Dunning deliveries by the bailiff make, that costs everything extra. Resultniss he has nothing what would be seizable, costs for me again approx. 700, - Mark for the lawyer. I have good money bad thrown behind. End of the song, the lawyer released from the mandate. I do not need to mention that there was only one stupid in this story. Me. I know this is not really constructive, but so you have an insight into what can happen.

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Anonym

Lend money to gambling addicts?

10th Apr. 2018, at 07:12 pm CEST#6
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Marie3010 wrote on 10/04/2018 at 16:19: Hi there,

maybe I find good advice here, have been a silent reader so far and now I thought I'll write something myself

The following problem: I lent someone money to play...we are not talking about 10 or 100 euros, but it is in the 4-digit range. Trustworthy person (actually), but so far instead of repayment there were only flimsy excuses and probably the money was gambled away again. Offers to go to therapy (so together) remained unfortunately unimpressed. I don't know what to do, because since it was amicable, I don't have the means to take legal action. I also feel sorry for the person. However, it is a lot of money and I do not want to endanger our friendship. Everything stupid! If this continues, my friend lands there still on the street...

was probably also my mistake, but what would you do? Does anyone have experience with this and advice? On the one hand to get vll a part of the money back (hey, gambling debts are also debts of honor, right?), on the other hand to help even if the Gambling addiction is not admitted and is blocked?

Thank you in advance!

Marie




Hmm, well if you know him well..maybe you know if he has things that can be made into money...then you just take them as a pledge... Gold chains or something...
otherwise you will not see your money again... because the financial situation is probably far worse than you think

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RiverSong
Legend

Lend money to gambling addicts?

11th Apr. 2018, at 03:59 pm CEST#7
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Liked this post: Avatar von RiverSong RiverSong
Marie3010 wrote on 10/04/2018 at 16:19: Hi there,

maybe I find good advice here, have been a silent reader so far and now I thought I'll write something myself

The following problem: I lent someone money to play...we are not talking about 10 or 100 euros, but it is in the 4-digit range. Trustworthy person (actually), but so far instead of repayment there were only flimsy excuses and probably the money was gambled away again. Offers to go to therapy (so together) remained unfortunately unimpressed. I don't know what to do, because since it was amicable, I don't have the means to take legal action. I also feel sorry for the person. However, it is a lot of money and I do not want to endanger our friendship. Everything stupid! If this continues, my friend lands there still on the street...

was probably also my mistake, but what would you do? Does anyone have experience with this and advice? On the one hand to get vll a part of the money back (hey, gambling debts are also debts of honor, right?), on the other hand to help even if the Gambling addiction is not admitted and is blocked?

Thank you in advance!

Marie

i'll try to be neutral, if you have been a really quiet reader here and are not a second id then you have also read the current cases --> of not paying back and pretending everything is fine <-- here and can also give yourself the answer.
either way i can only advise you that gambling addicts are just as sick as other addicts and will do anything to get money. if this works once with the borrowing and not paying back then the person will either have already done it with other friends or still do it. it is sooo easy.
because of this the probability that there are already many more people he owes something to is of course very high, you won't see your money again, no small installments and further concessions on your part will help.
if you have not received a cent and only flimsy excuses, there will be nothing for you the next time you receive money.

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Anonym

Lend money to gambling addicts?

12th Apr. 2018, at 06:53 pm CEST#8
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No, don't lend money to someone who is addicted, it only prolongs their suffering, they need to be really down so they know where they are.

For me it was like this, I looked in the fridge and had nothing more to eat, not a cent more in my wallet, and the month was long, I have also survived this phase, somehow there is always a way.
I took a longer break from gambling and put my finances in order, now I pay off my debts over a few years, but I would never borrow money from a trusted person, especially not in the four-digit range, if something goes wrong then the shit hits the fan, if the person borrows money and does not pay it back it is a characterless A... hole it is a privilege if you can pay off someone what pumps, then the repayment should be a point of honor.

But it is probably the addiction that makes you become such a "monster", from the heart he probably wants to pay back but the head makes him a line through the bill and uncontrollably pays the money in the casino without having an overview.

There were here umpteen topics where you have lent money among users or even to strangers in the casino / Spielo, if one begs me there is an announcement, is then still not calm it goes to the supervision / security that have then usually pronounced a house ban for a few weeks, if one in the casino the wrong adores then it can also hail times nen few whistles, already experienced a few times.

Among friends no one pumps me, if so then there is as an answer come we meet then we go shopping together for the rest of the week, this is usually gratefully accepted and I get the coals for the purchase + a case of beer back, so it must run, point of honor!
I also have no gold-plated thunder bar but I get along very well despite debts.

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Anonym

Lend money to gambling addicts?

12th Apr. 2018, at 09:48 pm CEST#9
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you only make the mistake once - as you learn from all mistakes...4-digit is of course also a house number. I'm sorry for you, vlls yet what.

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Marie3010

Lend money to gambling addicts?

12th Apr. 2018, at 10:27 pm CEST#10
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Thanks for all the posts. I'll see how I deal with it now.

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